Knowing Is Half the Battle

Sidelines, jump offs, hussies, floosies, whatever you want to call them are getting a lot of press these days thanks to GOP presidential hopeful Herman Cain.  Let me first start off by saying I realize that we are all human and no one is infallible.  However, the most recent woman to come forward, whether her allegations are true or not, is one of many.  This woman, Ginger White, alleges a 13 year affair with Mr. Cain.  I will say there is much to be said about a woman (or man) who willingly participates in an affair with someone’s husband/wife.  I know that the married person is the one who took the vows, or the boyfriend or girlfriend committed to being in a relationship – but this post isn’t about who is wrong or most wrong.  I just think there are a lot women and some men who DON’T know they are the jump off (or in denial). How could you not know? At any rate, I’ve devised a quick list to help some of y’all out.  Fellas don’t be mad at me, but some of these chicks act like they have no clue.

1. All you seem to get are text messages during the early morning and late evening hours.  When you think about it, if a person is with their main squeeze they generally won’t have time for conversation.
2. All you have is a cell phone number.  Now I know this is debatable as a lot of people have given up home phone service for a cell phone. Take the information as you will.
3. You have been dating for what you feel is an extended amount of time and you have not met any of his/her close friends or family.  You know he/she has a child, but after a year you haven’t met or even seen the kid…quit playing yourself.
4. Special days/events - The holidays come and go and you are never with them. His work or office events are always the bomb, but geh wha ? You are never invited.  Birthdays are a definite no go and you seem to only celebrate a week or two later.  Wake up.
5. Social Networking – if you both have a facebook page and you are not friends…umm, you can’t be serious about being his main squeeze. Not that I am an advocate for joint facebook pages (I really don’t get that), but if you are that close of a friend in real life, you really should have the benefit of being friends in cyber land.
6. When he is with you, there is always that phone call that is taken outside of the room.  Furthermore, if he is texting the ENTIRE time he is with you, trust me he is checking in back home.
7. Do you oftentimes hear - I'll call you right back? And your call is a few days or more later? Umm...sorry boo boo.
8. Last but certainly not least - you have NEVER EVER been  to his house. You don't even know where he lives.  In what world does that make sense? He is hiding you from something or someone - or even better he doesn't want to see how many toothbrushes are in the bathroom, all the kids' toys in the den, and definitely not the pads and flat iron under the bathroom sink.

Now I don't propose to know anything about the sideline life - I just know red flags. For those of you that know you are the sidepiece and think you are the business, please explain why you are in the shadows and not in the public…Ginger White, Monica Lewinsky, Rielle Hunter, Lil Kim, Fantasia, Ashanti…and the list goes on. And if he keeps saying how miserable he is at home,  if he is really miserable, he wouldn’t be there #Justathought.  And those of you with a side boo, you never know how crazy your side woman can get – think Steve McNair. May he rest in peace.  Pretty morbid but I’m just saying. 

Sidebar: I hope to get a little more consistent because there is so much I have to catch up on. So who knows you could get two posts this week.